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"Billy Bonds will need to spend some dosh and buy in a new striker, and someone to keep the back four tight – they were diabolical."I wasn't too well up on football tactics so just nodded my agreement."Anyway," he continued, "how are you doing? We haven't seen each other for ... what is it ... ten years? Are you still married to what's-her-name, Miriam?"I nodded again and took another swig of my pint."You know," he leaned towards me and spoke quietly, "on your stag night I was in two minds to let that Bunny Girl take you back home with her and fuck you rigid, and you not turn up up for the wedding next morning." He grinned. "Not that you would have been able to do the business with her when she got you back to her gaff, you were as pissed as a rat." He laughed, and once again I nodded.He continued with his reminiscences. "I remember seeing Martin Hodge at the wedding ... he was a nasty piece of work then, and he hasn't improved over the years. You know the Drug Squad have eyes on. ‘Jerry, what exactly were you thinking when you were uh, well, having a nice time with with my brassiere?’ ‘To be very honest Mrs. H, I was thinking and wondering what happened to your husband and yes I was wondering how good a time a guy could have with your boobs.’ ‘My husband drove a gas tanker truck which due to something wrong with a bonding wire, a spark was made and that was the end of the truck, my husband and part of a neighborhood.’ ‘So you think my boobs could give a guy a good time, do you?’ ‘Yes Mrs. H but what would really make the whole thing nice is to be in love with the woman whose boobs they are.’ ‘Love is a beautiful emotion, Jerry and I am not angry about you taking the bra although I looked in vain for it.’ Mrs. H looked at me in a meaningful way, probably wondering if I could really understand love and maybe could she be interested in a young guy. But I do have a few ideas. As I understand you are quite the guy when it comes to small engines, like lawnmower.
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